philodice:
The poem is about Prometheus stealing Odin's fire from the sun.
Here is the last part.

Por unu raporto momento mi prenis
mian lokon inter la steloj.
Mia arda cindro skorio
al nenio sur la tero.
La ŝtel fajro brul.
Stellumo de la Ĉielo.
La ŝtel fajro brul.
Stellumo de la Ĉielo.
Fragmentoj de la suno.
En mia memoro,
ili ankoraŭ bruli min.

For one brief moment
I took my place among the stars.
My ember slagged to
nothing on the earth.
The stolen fire burns.
Starlight from heaven.
Fragments of the sun.
In my memory, they still burn me.

I used a dictionary to help with words I didn't know.

I really like the poem, by the way. Prometheus has always been one of my favorites. I mean, he must have REALLY liked us, to risk his punishment to help us.

Anyway, your translation is pretty good. Again, only the grammar is off a little:

Por sola, kurta, momento, mi prenis
mian lokon inter la steloj.(I really like that line!)
Mia arda cindro skoriis
al nenio sur la tero.
La ŝtelita fajro brulas.
Stellumo de la Ĉielo.
Fragmentoj de la suno.
En mia memoro,
ili ankoraŭ brulas min.

Really good, laux mi!

JBen:
A literal translation of my attempt would be: "Because of my innoncence, I didn't know that the sun would touch me back."

That is perfect. So the finished poem:
Mi tusxis la sunon, pro mia senkulpeco,
Malkonscia, ke la suno retusxis min.
Konsumis min, korpe kaj anime,
Dum mi falis, trenante kometvostoj
Malsupren alterigxe.
Mi ŝtelis la fajron.
La fajro ŝtelis min.
Nenio sur la Tero
gustas simile, kiel la suno.
En mia mondo nenio
sentas simile, kiel la suno.
Mi vivas malvarme,
kun neniu restajxo, por bruli.
Mia koro, mia radlumo.
Irinte.
Por sola, kurta, momento, mi prenis
mian lokon inter la steloj.
Mia arda cindro skoriis
al nenio sur la tero.
La ŝtelita fajro brulas.
Stellumo de la Ĉielo.
Fragmentoj de la suno.
En mia memoro,
ili ankoraŭ brulas min.

My "troll response" theory and experiment now have proof: Don't change the language, change the words you use. It can be elegant, expressive, exact, and useful. Change how you use it. If you don't think Eo can do what you want it to do, you may be using it wrong.
Next stop: I will record myself reading this. Be prepared to laugh at my terrible Usono pronunciation.
I know I will.
Thank you for helping with my experiment!

philodice:
My "troll response" theory and experiment now have proof: Don't change the language, change the words you use. It can be elegant, expressive, exact, and useful. Change how you use it. If you don't think Eo can do what you want it to do, you may be using it wrong.
Next stop: I will record myself reading this. Be prepared to laugh at my terrible Usono pronunciation.

You don't have to be ashamed about your pronouncation. And you don't have to be ashamed about diving into E-o with an automatic online translator. I also did it first. I even read my e-o emails firstly this way using Esperantilo. But that gets borring, so I translated it later word by word. Writing I did all time looking for word by word at the dictionary.

For me it's also very interesting to hear slightly where somebody comes from and to understand e-o nevertheless.

Excample 1: Stefan MacGill. There are casually some very small sound coloring which only English natives are doing. Something what I only could produce chewing some bubblegum.

Excample 2: I'm not sure completly, but I believe the singer of Bolo Young could be English native. (Bolo Young at lastfm.com)

Excample 3: Suvubroj | ( hiyayaywhopee )

Excample 4: mgremo

Last, but not least to mention. I believe most user here will agree: We will never laugh about you - only with you!

@ Philodice:
"Don't change the language, change the words you use. "
I like this quote, not because I necessarily agree in principal (although I guess even my willingness speak English with experimental grammar forms still works within the frameworks of the language, technically speaking ) but because it's a nice proactive way to explore and demonstrate creativity.

And nice poem btw. I'm not the poetic type but it looks very well constructed and very, well, just damn well written Bonege!

One small point Philodice.

Innocent/Innocence covers two notions in English - Not guilty/Blamelessness and Naivity/Ignorance

Senkulpa in Esperanto relates to the first or these meanings.

I presume the Sun was touched in your poem because you didn't know it was hot, not because you were without sin.

philodice:Malkonscia, ke la suno retusxis min..
Dum mi falis, trenante kometvostoj

Two suggested small modification:
Nekonscia (Mal is used for opposites).
kometvostojn (this is the direct object of trenante).

Otherwise, nice going!