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Translation Help

Brenin :lta, 2. maaliskuuta 2009

Viestejä: 10

Kieli: English

Brenin (Näytä profiilli) 2. maaliskuuta 2009 3.41.04

I am trying to translate some liturgical poems into Esperanto, but I am completely new at it. I was wondering if anyone would be able to help me with this? I have been using the dictionary here on Lernu to do it, but I feel like I am just not quite getting it.

It's ten four-line poems, and several of them have the same lines in them.

Thank you very much.

Rohan (Näytä profiilli) 2. maaliskuuta 2009 5.30.58

Hi, Brenin.

I'd be glad to help. You can send me the poems as a message in lernu. ridulo.gif

- Rohan

Rohan (Näytä profiilli) 2. maaliskuuta 2009 11.21.45

Well, Brenin sent me the verses, and they proved too difficult for me to translate.

They present a very good translation challenge. They're still up for grabs! Gauntlet-pickers, come one, come all! ridulo.gif

tommjames (Näytä profiilli) 2. maaliskuuta 2009 11.48.33

Poems are always difficult to translate. But I'd like to have a look.. send them to me if you like.

tommjames (Näytä profiilli) 2. maaliskuuta 2009 16.26.15

Ok, I made a literal translation, which you can view here: http://zz9pza.110mb.com/eo/brenin_poem.htm

As this is literal, I would consider it a bad translation for a poem, but it should save you having to look in that dictionary too much.

I will have a go at a proper translation which I'll post later.

Brenin (Näytä profiilli) 2. maaliskuuta 2009 16.57.33

Oh my goodness! Thank you so much! Heh, I see a lot of the mistakes I was making now. ridulo.gif Learning already!

mccambjd (Näytä profiilli) 2. maaliskuuta 2009 17.00.47

I like it.

A few suggestions:

if you want to go old school, thee = ci
maiden = virgulino, needziĝintulino
old crone = maljunulinaĉo
censor = probable typo = censer = incensujo
scourge = vipo, skurĝo
rite = rito
ebbers = ?! is this a typo ?!

Brenin (Näytä profiilli) 2. maaliskuuta 2009 17.03.59

Thank you ridulo.gif Looking back I see I made quite a few typos. I was typing them from memory and I let my fingers get ahead of my brain.

I did mean censer, and ebbers should be embers. lol

mccambjd:I like it.

A few suggestions:

if you want to go old school, thee = ci
maiden = virgulino, needziĝintulino
old crone = maljunulinaĉo
censor = probable typo = censer = incensujo
scourge = vipo, skurĝo
rite = rito
ebbers = ?! is this a typo ?!

tommjames (Näytä profiilli) 2. maaliskuuta 2009 17.32.41

mccambjd:if you want to go old school, thee = ci maiden = virgulino, needziĝintulino old crone = maljunulinaĉo censor = probable typo = censer = incensujo scourge = vipo, skurĝo rite = rito ebbers = ?! is this a typo ?!
Thanks for that, I've updated it with some of your suggestions.

"Maiden" I think dosn't necessarily have to be a virgin. And "crone" isn't always pejorative so I'll leave the "aĉ" out.

henma (Näytä profiilli) 3. maaliskuuta 2009 4.14.52

mccambjd:maiden = virgulino, needziĝintulino
I think maiden could be fraŭlino also.

Amike,

Daniel.

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